Journey Toward Motherhood

Feeling Bleh...

2010-05-19T08:56:00.000-04:00

As you all probably have noticed, I haven't been posting all that much lately. It's mainly because I feel pretty stuck in a rut and not motivated at all.

I haven't worked out in three weeks.

I haven't watched my calorie intake in two weeks.

I haven't cleaned or organized or done any of the things I wanted to do to reach my goals.

So that's where I am. I'm going to try to get back to being motivated and remind myself of my goals. If not for my future family, for me at least. I'm in a wedding in 3 weeks, and I'd like to look better for that, so that means I need to get a handle of my eating habits and start working out again. Maybe tonight...

Upgrade!

2010-05-17T10:17:00.004-04:00

So my car has been super annoying lately. And by annoying, I mean stalling. It's been very consistently stalling every day, much to my annoyance. It's kind of bizarre, because it doesn't always stall, but it is pretty consistent about when it stalls. Never in the morning. Always in the evening after work. Always only once. Always if I recently drove it. Almost never right when I start it. Almost always within a mile of leaving where I am. Almost always at a stop sign or light, but sometimes when I'm just breaking to slow down (that time was fun...).

Anyway, I took the car in to my local mechanic to have them look at it. Apparently they attempted to find the problem in the morning, when it doesn't stall, so they couldn't figure it out. Of course. Charged me $100 for diagnosing it, and gave it back to me in the same condition. Thanks a lot guys. Stalled within a mile of leaving the mechanics, of course.

So anyway, I didn't want to deal with it anymore, and I've been waiting for the car to have problems anyway so I could get rid of it. It's a 1997 Toyota Camry, and for the most part, in decent condition, but it's old, beat up, and I really just wanted an upgrade for a change. So this past week, Husband and I went to the dealer! And it was finally out with the old (bye beloved Camry) and in with the new (hello Honda Accord!).

essentially what my Camry looked like

essentially what my Accord looks like

Wordless Wednesday: Bridal Shower

2010-05-12T11:00:00.001-04:00

Bridal Shower Decor

Favors - Martini Glasses!

Living Room Table

End Table

Foooood!

Cake Table

Presents!

Bride and me!

Baby on the Brain

2010-05-11T12:01:00.000-04:00

So, when I started this blog, I had serious baby on the brain. I couldn't stop reading baby-related blogs, whether it was those that had babies, those that were pregnant with babies, those that were trying to have babies, or those that wanted babies someday (like me!). I started this blog with goals for things I needed (or wanted) to accomplish before having a baby.

Then I kind of got subdued and didn't have as much baby on the brain as before. I had more wedding on the brain, because my best friend is getting married in June, and I was busy planning her bridal shower and bachelorette party and doing stuff like that. Now the shower is over (pics tomorrow!) and the bachelorette party is in a few weeks and I'm done planning for it.

Yes, I have baby on the brain again. I want one sooooooo bad, I'm tempted to throw out my BCP and just start doing the deed with hubby every night! I'm sure he won't mind, right?

I just want one of these:

Don't you?

Goals Checkin #11

2010-05-10T08:29:00.000-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Check
Clean Bathrooms: Cleaned 2/3
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Fail

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Not Due

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 0/5 days
Healthy Eating: 0/7 days
Weight: 161.4 lbs (-13.2 lbs)

So I know I haven't updated lately. It's mostly because I haven't had anything to say really. With so many things going on in others lives, I've felt fairly insignificant. I honestly didn't want to say anything too happy, with some friends in pain, or too depressing, with some friends experiencing joy, so I've just said nothing instead.

Hopefully I can get back into the swing of things and start posting again. I also need to get into the swing of things when it comes to diet and exercise. I haven't worked out in two weeks, and I haven't monitored my food intake in a week. Luckily I haven't gained, but I'm sure I'm probably gaining fat and losing muscle.

Anyway... I'm back. Hope everyone else is doing well.

Goals Checkin #10

2010-04-26T11:00:00.000-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Sort of
Clean Bathrooms: Cleaned 2/3
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Check

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Check

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 3/5 days
Healthy Eating: 4/7 days
Weight: 162.2 lbs (-12.4 lbs)

Yay, I lost 2 lbs! That's impressive! I also was able to clean the living room, part of the kitchen, and cleaned all the toilets (3!) while still keeping up with all my TV shows! I also spent all of Saturday in the yard, weeding and mulching! So all-in-all, it was a very productive week! One more week until the bridal shower for my friend!

Top 3 Thursday: Favorite Shops

2010-04-22T08:09:00.000-04:00

From Confessions From a Working Mom and The (Un)Experienced Mom, today's question is:

What are your Top 3 favorite places to shop?

Shopping... I need to do some...

3. A.C. Moore - Recently (like the last couple years), I've become really into crafts. Specifically paper crafts like scrap booking or card making. A.C. Moore is my go-to store for all things craft-related! I can spend HOURS in there, just cruising the aisles to try to figure out what I want or need!

2. Express - this store is excellent (or at least it was the last time I went in one). They have both professional clothes for work, and fun clothes for play. Plus they have big blow out sales all the time that are awesome. And their pants are amazing! Whenever I need something nice and don't mind spending a little extra, this is where I go!

1. Target - of course Target is my number one store. It's probably a lot of people's number one store! Cheap and still classy, I love it. Their products are a little more high-end than Walmart, but they're still really inexpensive. I never walk out of Target empty-handed! And I'll go there for fun, even if I'm not looking for anything in particular!

What are your top 3 favorite places to shop?

Wordless Wednesday: Bachelorette Party Invitations

2010-04-21T08:52:00.004-04:00

Husband Says...

2010-04-20T10:03:00.001-04:00

So Tuesdays are often the days I talk about something substantial. On Mondays, I do my Goals Checkin, Wednesdays are Wordless, Thursdays are Top 3s, and Fridays are random, if I post at all. But Tuesdays... Tuesdays are supposed to be meaningful. Sometimes I post about my husband, sometimes I post about my friends, sometimes I post about parenthood.

I wasn't really sure what to post about today. I feel like nothing's really happened since last Tuesday that would be of any interest to anyone. For the most part, the crazy wedding drama is over, although that stupid groomsmen unfriended me on Facebook, I guess to get back at me for ruining his plans? I've been semi-busy trying to get ready for my friend's Bridal Shower, but I haven't really done much since last week. I still need to clean the house, buy some supplies, and decorate, but I probably won't do that until next week sometime. Supposedly, based on the RSVPs I've received, there's only going to be ten of us anyway. And things with the husband are still going well.

Actually, things with the husband are going really well. We've been getting busy on a regular basis and it's apparently been pretty good, because the husband seems really happy. He's always been spending a lot more time with me lately than he used to. Usually he'll be playing video games and I'll be watching TV in the evening, but lately he's been snuggling up next to me on the couch, which I really appreciate. I love watching TV and I love my husband, and doing my favorite thing with my favorite person is absolutely the best.

When we went to bed last night, Husband was snuggling me and telling me how much he loved me and how happy he was to have married me, and I was feeling really warm and fuzzy. I told him that I felt like we've been really happy lately, like happier than normal. We're usually in a fairly good mood, but little things still annoy us. Like he gets annoyed if I don't clean up after myself (which I'm really bad at) and I get annoyed if he thinks he should get laid without doing anything for me (like cleaning up after me, that would be nice...). But lately we haven't even been feeling any of those. He doesn't seem to mind I have a mess covering the dining table and that I haven't vacuumed in a month, and I haven't been minding when he asks for sex, because he's been so sweet and good about getting me in the mood too.

So anyway, we were talking about how happy we were and how Husband was doing things to make me happy which in turn got me to do things that made him happy, and vice-versa. And Husband said the best thing ever:

"We're in an infinite happy loop."

Of course a software engineer would say something like that, but it was super adorable and I feel giddy just thinking it. We are in an infinite happy loop. I hope it continues for quite sometime!

Has your husband/significant other said anything so dorky and yet so cute you can't help but love him for it?

Goals Checkin #9

2010-04-19T09:32:00.002-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Fail
Clean Kitchen: Sort of
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Fail

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Fail

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 3/5 days
Healthy Eating: 3/7 days
Weight: 164.2 lbs (-10.4 lbs)

Woohoo - down 0.8 lbs from last week! This is AMAZING considering how poorly I ate last week and I missed TWO workouts!! So mad at myself for that, but I have finally lost 10 pounds since I started this fun, so I'm feeling motivated all over again!

I deleted most of the shows I mentioned last week from my DVR so that they wouldn't record, but I was convinced by my best friend and her soon-to-be husband to not give up on Fringe, so I've decided I'll try to keep watching that. We'll see how it goes... I may have to quit some other shows... or WoW... because as you can tell, I made zero progress on any of my other goals. I suck.

Top 3 Thursday: Guilty Crushes

2010-04-15T10:05:00.000-04:00

From Confessions From a Working Mom and The (Un)Experienced Mom, today's question is:

What are your Top 3 "guilty" celebrity cruses?

Oooooh... this one will be fun I think! Crushes are fun.

3. Neil Jackson - I first saw this guy in Blade: The Series and he was a bad-ass vampire mofo who you did not want to mess with. Now he's in one of my favorite shows as a gym instructor (Make It or Break It). How the mighty have fallen... but he's still super hot and I still think of him as a bad-ass vampire mofo, even when he's training teenage girls how to tumble.

2. Ian Somerhalder - what can I say, I like bad-ass vampire mofos! Please note that I like bad-ass vampires, not wimpy stupid teenage vampires (a.k.a. Edward). Although I think I was first introduced to Ian while watching LOST, I've really fallen for him since he started his bad-assery as the vampire Damon on The Vampire Diaries. Ian Somerhalder, you are smoking hot as Damon and you can drink my blood any day (please don't kill me!).

1. Scarlett Johansson - what do you want from me, she's HOT! She is SMOKING hot. I can't help myself! And as far as I know, she's never played a vampire, which means she must be really hot to get my attention...

What are your top 3 celebrity crushes??

Wordless Wednesday: Bridal Shower Cocktails

2010-04-14T11:04:00.002-04:00

Source

*I'm only having 4 of those and 1 garnish, but still... you get the idea

Crazy Wedding Drama

2010-04-13T10:29:00.001-04:00

As you all know, my best friend is getting married in June and I'm her Matron of Honor. This is a story about them and the names have been changed to protect the innocent (or not so innocent). Her husband, Groom, has these two groomsmen: Groomsmen 1 and Groomsmen 2. I've hung out with them on a number of occasions and thought they were pretty decent guys. Apparently, Groomsmen 1 and Groomsmen 2 are planning this major blow-out Bachelor Party for Groom. They're driving him to Chicago (we live in New England) and they're spending the weekend there. They'll be seeing a Cubs game, going out drinking, etc. There are about seven guys going, including my husband.

Now, Groom also has this close female friend, FF. They've been friends for years, though my friend, Bride, has often felt a little insecure about Groom's closeness with FF. She doesn't really trust FF around Groom, although she trusts Groom. Anyway - when Groom and Bride got engaged, FF insisted that she wanted to involved in the bride's parties - Bridal Shower, Bachelorette Party, etc. Unfortunately, she can't attend the Bachelorette Party, but she can attend the Bridal Shower, which she RSVP'd to and said she was going to be there.

Okay, so that you're all caught up, let's explain what happened yesterday.

I get an e-mail from FF - she's been "convinced" by the boys to fly out to Chicago and "surprise" Groom by showing up and attending his Bachelor Party. Unfortunately, the Bachelor Party is on the same weekend as Bride's Bridal Shower, so she will no longer be able to attend. She's changing her RSVP to a not attending.

Well! I know that Bride will not be happy about this. She's been a little insecure in the past about Groom and FF's close relationship and although I don't know if she's still insecure, I think it's a bad idea for FF to go to Groom's party for the weekend without Bride knowing about it. I also figure that since FF isn't super rich, she'd be staying in the hotel room with all the other guys, and I figured Bride would especially not like that. So I start pondering: What do I do?

Do I tell Bride? I know she'll be upset and she's already stressed enough as it is.

Do I tell Groom? It's supposed to be a surprise that FF is going, but Groom will know that Bride wouldn't like that, so he could tell Groomsmen 1 and 2 not to invite her.

Do I tell FF? Probably not - I don't think Bride would appreciate FF knowing that Bride is a little insecure about FF's friendship with Groom.

So what do I decide to do? Tell Groomsmen 1 and Groomsmen 2! I figure since they're the ones setting up the party and they are the ones that invited FF, they can uninvite her just as easily. So I decide to write them an e-mail and this is what it says:

Groomsmen 1 and Groosmen 2,

FF just informed me that she would no longer be attending Bride's bridal shower because she was "convinced" to surprise Groom and go to his bachelor party in Chicago. I just wanted to throw my $0.02 in for you guys to consider since I'm not sure how to broach the subject with FF or Bride.

Although I know you guys aren't planning some super raunchy bachelor party where women would feel uncomfortable attending, I think that it's not wise to include women (especially only one woman) in Groom's bachelor party. I know that Groom and FF are extremely good friends, but I think that's the kind of situation that might make Bride feel uncomfortable if she knows FF is going to be in Chicago with Groom while she is at home. Plus I know Bride was pleased that FF was attending her bridal shower and hearing that she isn't so she can go be with Groom isn't something that's going to go over well.

I strongly urge you to reconsider this course of action since I think it can only cause strife for the happy couple. I know that there's nothing between Groom and FF besides friendship, but I think there's been some jealously and insecurity, at least in the past, from Bride in regards to Groom and FF's relationship. I think Bride would be extremely uncomfortable with FF going to Groom's bachelor party, especially if there aren't other women attending.

I thought I would broach the subject with you guys before talking to Bride about it, because I think that's something she deserves to know about and I'm not sure she'd keep it a secret from Groom since I think it would upset her.

Thanks for your time,

~Megan

I figured this was a nice enough e-mail and that the groomsmen would understand where I was coming from. I was a little worried that if the Bride heard about it, she might not appreciate me telling these boys about her insecurities, but I figured she would rather not be involved at all and that she would rather the boys know about it then the female friend, FF.

Then I receive this:

Wait, what?

I invited FF because, as you mentioned, she is a good friend of Groom. The reasoning behind it is, as an inside joke to Groom (who does NOT know she is coming), we thought it'd be funny to have FF there as an unexpected "WTF" type of surprise. It's essentially a gag. I wasn't aware that she was even going to the bridal shower. I didn't even realize Bride's bridal shower was that weekend.

As far as Bride being jealous, I can assure you she has nothing to be jealous about. I mean, FF has hung out with just Groom on several occasions. She'll be with seven guys on this trip. There's nothing there between she and Groom. Zip, nadda, zilch. She's like a little sister to both Groom, which is another reason she got an invite.I think he's think it's hilarious.

I can assure you that FF's presence at the Bachelor Party will be the most trivial sin occurring within our escapades.

There's also something else I don't get about how this could be problematic - FF is a devout Christian. She's waiting until marriage for everything. She has zero interest in even holding a guy's hand unless it seems like it could lead to marriage. I can assure you that she is not a home wrecker who will be looking to damage Groom and Bride's future as a married couple. She doesn't even think about that kind of stuff, which is why this seems so bizarre to me. The suggestion that this in inappropriate, with all due respect, is laughable. Like I mentioned, she's like a sister but also essentially "one of the guys" to Groom, hence the invite.

I'm just baffled by this whole thing. Is this really a problem?

Thanks,
Groomsmen 1

To me, it sounded like he wasn't understand. I know, and he knows, and most everyone knows, that there's nothing but friendship between Groom and FF, but that wasn't really my point. My point was that I thought Bride would be uncomfortable with the situation and so I thought it would be better not to invite FF at all, regardless of what is, or isn't, likely to occur. So I responded with this:

I am sure that Groom and FF have a strictly platonic relationship and that there's nothing to be concerned about in this situation.

But I feel compelled to bring it up because I think Bride would be uncomfortable with this. I think, in general, it's inappropriate to invite a girl to a bachelor party unless except under very strict circumstances, and this isn't one of them. Whether or not any of you, or Groom, or FF, think this situation is something to be concerned about is really not the issue. The issue is that Bride, Groom's fiancee, will most likely be upset with this, is what I have a problem with. I think that this could cause just more stress for Bride and she'll be frustrated with everyone involved in this, including Groom who had nothing to do with it.

Have you asked Groom if he would be okay with you inviting any girls to the bachelor party? Did he give you a list of people he wanted invite and FF was on it? I think that if you asked Groom, he probably wouldn't suggest inviting FF.

I think that if you guys don't understand how uncomfortable this might make Bride or feel the need to do anything about it, I will have to either talk to Groom or Bride about it (not sure which yet). I don't want to tell Bride because I think it would upset her, so I may decide to talk to Groom first about it.

~Megan

I was really concerned with involving the Bride because I knew she was already stressed and this would probably just add to it. I also had some suggestions from people at work to just tell the Groom and have him tell the groomsmen to uninvite FF. I knew the Groom knew that Bride had issues with FF and so he wouldn't want FF going out of respect for his fiancee. Anyway... the next e-mail's fun:

Please leave it to me and/or Groomsmen 2 to bring this up to Bride . One of us will talk to her and she can mention any issues she may have with us, as we are organizing the party. If she appears as if she is going to be hurt or upset in any way, I will tell FF that she can not come.

However, I need to stress that only Groomsmen 2 or myself should speak to Bride about it. We have not and would not interfere in any way with the way the bachelorette party is being handled, so please offer the same respect back to us.

I appreciate the thought and logic (I think you bring up a valid, possibly rocky scenario), but we should be the ones to speak to Bride about this.

Thanks,
Groomsmen 1

Does anyone else think this is weird, or is it just me? I thought this e-mail was super strange - why would they insist that I not speak to the Bride, who is my best friend. Wouldn't she be more comfortable hearing about this sketchy situation from me, her friend, instead of them, her fiance's friends? This e-mail, was apparently sent before they received my last e-mail, because I immediately received this:

Megan,

I think that if you guys don't understand how uncomfortable this might make Bride or feel the need to do anything about it, I will have to either talk to Groom or Bride about it (not sure which yet).

Am I imagining this, or are you essentially threatening to ruin the Bachelor Party?

As I mentioned, Groomsmen 2 or myself will talk to Bride about this. I told you that and I don't know why you still feel as if we aren't going to talk to her about it. You can feel free to now remove yourself from the situation. You've done a noble thing by mentioning the potential problem - thanks - and I said we will speak to Bride about this.

Now remove yourself from the situation. This whole thing no longer involves you now that I said Groomsmen 2 or myself will speak to Bride.

And no, I did not get a list from Groom. I know who Groom's friend are, I've known him for 14 years. This is a Bachelor Party, accept what it is and move on.

I can't believe this is even happening right now. Groomsmen 2 and I have invested about $1,000 each into this trip, so please take a step back and think about what you're doing here.

Groomsmen 1

Anyone else feel like they're going crazy? I thought I was going crazy, haha. These responses from Groomsmen 1 were just sooooo bizarre! Why was he so insistent that I not speak to the Bride? Was he going to try to spin it someway to come across as not as bad? And how exactly was he going to do that? Was he thinking he'd throw me under the bus somehow? And how?

So... I did what any good Matron of Honor would do. I immediately called the Bride to give her a heads up that this shit-storm was coming her way. I let her know about how FF had canceled on her Bridal Shower to go to the Bachelor Party, how I thought that was sketchy and had tried to talk to the groomsmen without involving the Bride, how the groomsmen were anti-everything I had to say, and how they insisted they be the ones to speak to Bride, and how I felt she should know before they spoke to her.

Bride was furious that they invited FF. She was thankful I told her and angry that they wouldn't just listen to what I was saying and that she even had to get involved. She let me know she was going to immediately call one of them up, and I let her know that I would tell them I told her and just pretend I didn't know they told me not too, hehe. BUT when I got back to my desk, I had this e-mail (which I decided to ignore):

I'm still a little confused about this whole thing.... The idea that ANYTHING like that would happen between is beyond laughable.

And are you just trying to "be a good firend" and stick up for Bride? because we have been over this with her before. We all told her NUMEROUS times that there was, is, and never will be anything beyond a friend ship between Groom and FF, and if you think that there ever will be it laughable. I dont see the need to dig up old dirt. I was under the impression that everyone has moved passed this and any problems have been resolved.
Your opinion is noted and we would like thank you for your concerns. Please let either of us know if we can be of any further assistance to you.

Groomsmen 2

Excuse me, what? You guys knew that Bride wasn't a huge fan of Groom and FF spending time together but you went ahead and invited FF anyway??? I decided to ignore this e-mail for now and respond to the one from Groomsmen 1 about how I shouldn't talk to Bride.

Of course I do not want to ruin Groom's bachelor party, and I know the whole thing is a surprise for him. I just also know that FF going will make Bride uncomfortable. I thought talking to you guys would be enough to deal with the situation, but it just seemed like our conversations weren't resolving anything - I'm sure you guys feel the same way.

I won't talk to Groom, but I did call Bride to give her a heads-up, so I'm sure she'll be talking to you guys about it soon. Sorry - I called her before I saw your e-mails about not talking to her (although I really don't understand why you're so adamant that I stay out of it). Bride is my best friend and I know she'd be upset by the situation, so I was trying to deal with it without involving her or Groom. Since it seemed like we weren't making much progress, I told her, so she could do what she wanted with the information (which I believe will involve talking to you guys).

If I was doing something on the bachelorette party that you guys thought would make Groom uncomfortable, I hope that you would first talk to me about it, as I did with you guys. If I didn't seem receptive to your concerns, I wouldn't blame you for speaking with Groom about it, as I have now done with Bride. But no worries - I did not talk to Groom and I'm sure Bride won't either since it's a surprise to him.

Anyway, I hope everything goes well and that you guys have a blast at the party. Now that Bride's aware of the situation, I will stay out of it. I'm sorry for any inconvenience you think I may have caused - I just felt that as Bride's friend, I would try to be her advocate in this situation since she's got enough on her plate as it is, but now I'll let her handle it.

Good luck! And thanks for your help.

~Megan

Man, I'm so nice. Anyway... here's the response from Groomsmen 1, who also CC'd Bride on it so she could see all the e-mails that had been sent back and forth:

You could have given us, you know, 10 minutes to call her and speak with her. But nevermind, we're at where we're at now.

This whole situation was meant to be innocuous, fun and just to get some laughs out of Groom (or at the very least, at his expense). This was not designed to hurt or offend anyone, nor was it designed with any knowledge that it would cause hard feelings of any kind. We didn't think it would hurt anyone because - as Groomsmen 2 mentioned - we didn't even consider this to be an issue because we long ago thought it was a dead issue. Call it an oversight, I suppose.

I'm going to tell FF not to come and put the kibosh on this entire issue. The 'gag' is not worth hurting anyone, especially the person who needs to be hurt the least at this point in time. I'm not upset at all toward Bride by this and I will spin this to FF so she'll have no true idea as to why she's getting the boot.

Groomsmen 2, we need to do what's best for the situation. How we feel or how we see it does not matter, so let's just do what'll remedy the problem.

Megan, thanks for the well wishes with the party.

Groomsmen 1

And that was that. Apparently the Bride spoke to Groomsmen 1 for half the morning trying to sort this situation out and he forward her all the e-mails between him and myself as well as him and FF in which he convinces FF to attend the Bachelor Party and she doesn't even mention she already has plans to attend the Bridal Shower. She also doesn't even ask "Would Bride be okay with me going?", she only asks "Are you guys okay with me being the only girl there?" Apparently she had zero concern for any of the other women's opinions.

I know, long, but it's been on my mind and I wanted to get it all out. What do you guys think? Am I wrong to be upset with Groomsmen 1? Were they the ones out of line? Give me your thoughts!

Goals Checkin #8

2010-04-12T11:56:00.000-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Fail
Clean Kitchen: Sort of
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Check

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Fail

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 3/7 days
Weight: 165.0 lbs (-9.6 lbs)

Woohoo - down 2.2 lbs from last week! I can't say that I really believe it though. I suspect I'll be up again next week, but as long as I'm not up 2.2 lbs, I'll probably still be happy. Trending in the down is awesome!

Okay, so this is my eight checkin, so I've basically been working on these goals for two whole months now. As we can see, I'm doing a really crappy job, especially in the cleaning department. In the past two months, I have at most cleaned the living room and the kitchen. The bedrooms, office, and bathrooms have yet to get a thorough (or even pretend thorough) cleaning. Therefore, I've come to the conclusion that something has to change if I'm going to make progress on these goals.

My main issue is time. I haven't had a ton of time to get stuff done. When I do have some spare time, I've been using it to catch up on all the TV I watch, because it's hard to keep up with it all throughout the week. I also have still been dedicated to playing WoW, which takes up nine to twelve hours a week.

Now, I know that when I have kids, I will be cutting WoW out altogether, but I wasn't willing to give it up quite yet. I also know I'll have to cut back from the TV, probably significantly. But I now feel like I should start making cuts sooner, rather than later. Especially if I'm ever going to get the house clean.

I'm going to start with the following cuts and see how it goes:

Good-bye eight shows. I'll miss you.

Thankful Part 2

2010-04-09T10:09:00.001-04:00

Some of you may remember this post in which I talked about my good friend K, and her husband J. I talk to K almost daily, although not always about her marriage or J. I don't always want to bring it up because I don't know if it breaks her heart when I do. I do know that K and J are still married, but not happily. Their one year anniversary is coming up in May... I wonder if they'll do anything special for it or not.

K and J didn't get married young or anything - they got married around 26, which seemed like a good age to get married. They had been dating for about five years before they got married, although it might've been closer to six by the time they actually were wed. I assume that at some point, they actually were happy. I remember K really wanted to get engaged to J and was impatiently waiting for him to propose... that seemed so long ago now.

J was in the Navy, so he wasn't often around. K and J had a long distance relationship for... well... almost all of their relationship. They would see each other on weekends every few months and during the holidays, but mostly it was long distance and they didn't see each other very much. I think they talked on the phone a lot, but that was it. Eventually, J proposed, and K started the wedding planning process, while J finished his last year in the Navy.

Eventually, J finished up, and K and J bought a house together and moved in together, a few months before their wedding. I think that's when things starting going horribly wrong. They just weren't used to living with another person who wasn't family. They had both grown into extremely independent people, and I don't think they knew how to cope with having this other person in their lives all the time suddenly. They didn't know how to depend on another person, or how to have another person depend on them. They are both just head-strong independent people that like to get their way, and marriage depends on compromise... something neither of them knows how to do.

A few months later, they were wed. Part of me wonders if they just went through with it because they had already invested so much money into the wedding and had already bought a house together. They probably also didn't want to disappoint their respective families. So they went through with this grand wedding and are now husband and wife. Unhappily.

It makes me extremely thankful to have my husband. We truly love each other and want to spend our lives together. Everyday we are thankful for finding each other and being together. Husband will often randomly say things like "I love my wife" and hug me, and I'm filled with such a sense of peace and happiness... I couldn't imagine being married and not feeling like that. But K and J are and I know they don't know what this peace and happiness feels like.

K and J haven't had sex since February. Part of me thinks that if they would just get laid they would both feel better and start treating each other better. But they're both stubborn and think having sex with the other person is like giving in (at least that's the view I get from K). I tried convincing her that if she would just give a little, she'll get a little in return, but she's so stubborn she won't do it, and the same is true for J. So there they are, going months without sex because they're too stubborn, and getting angrier and angrier at the other person, probably because they've gone so long without it.

I know that Husband gets a little unbearable to be around when he's gone too long* without sex. I can't imagine what he'd be like if he went two months, but I suspect that's a big part of K and J's problem. If they'd just have sex with each other, they'd probably be happier, don't you think?

*too long = 2 days

Top 3 Thursday: Favorite Ages

2010-04-08T08:58:00.000-04:00

From Confessions From a Working Mom and The (Un)Experienced Mom, today's question is:

What are your Top 3 favorite ages?
(or, your Top 3 favorite ages for your kids)

These will be my Top 3 favorite ages for myself, since I don't have any kids!

3. 16 - This was a great age for me. I finally could drive, and my parents got me this old beat up clunker in order to drive myself to school. I had a job that I could drive myself to, which meant spending money. I had some good friends and I remember to driving around town all the time with them. It was so much fun! This was the age I got a little bit of independence because I was allowed to go out on my own and do what I wanted. This was also the age that people in high school started to be a little less cruel and a little more nice and I started to feel like less of an outsider.
2. 21 - Okay, so I know a lot of people use this one, but it was a good age! This was the age I could finally drink legally and I could go into bars! My best friend was already 21 and she was probably relieved she didn't have to buy me alcohol anymore. This was the age of the parties! My best friend and my boyfriend at the time used to have parties every weekend. Friday nights were our nights to let loose and go wild (as wild as you can get with only 3 or 4 people...). 21 was the age I could finally do everything other adults could do.
1. 25 - This age was, absolutely, the best age I've had so far. This was the age that I finished my Master's degree and finally had some free time. This was the age that my fiancé and I bought our first house, and what a beautiful house it is! And last, but certainly not least, 25 was the age I married said fiancé and became a wife! I love you, hubby!

What are your top 3 favorite ages?

Wordless Wednesday: Bridesmaid Dress

2010-04-07T10:20:00.000-04:00

source

P.S. That's obviously not me and I won't look that good, but that's the dress!

BCP FAIL (ish?)

2010-04-06T08:37:00.002-04:00

So I'm a freak. I know I'm a freak. But not to worry! I'm trying to get over it!

So, as you all know via this post, I'm on birth control, specifically the birth control pill, and even more specifically I'm currently on ortho tri-cyclen. For the most part, it doesn't seem to super affect me, besides my libido. One of the really great things about being on the pill, is that you have a very regular cycle. Once you start taking those placebo pills, Aunt Flo (AF) will be right around the corner! Hello, Aunty!

Anyway... occasionally, that's not how things happen. Every so often, and I mean fairly rarely, Aunt Flo just doesn't come for her monthly visit. This has probably only happened to me like three times since I started on birth control pills, although two times have been recently, so I wonder if it's the ortho tri-cyclen.

Well, when Aunt Flo is late, and I'm on birth control, I kind of freak out a little. Like a big WTF is going on??? It's never been anything. I freak out, continue taking my pills, and then next month Aunt Flo comes to visit, right on schedule. But during that week that she's not here and she should be, I get concerned. Did I miss a pill and not notice? Did I not take the pills closely enough to 24-hours apart so that they failed? I couldn't be pregnant... could I?

Then I drive out to the store and pick up a test. That's right people - I pick up a pregnancy test while I'm on birth control and have been on it for the past six years, because I'm paranoid. Plus if I were to get pregnant, it's probably not a good idea to continue taking the pills like I'm not, right? I don't want to be ingesting hormones when I have potential baby growing inside me, right? I'm right, right?

Anyway, last week was when AF should've been here and wasn't. I broke out my trusty pregnancy test and did the whole peeing on a stick (POAS) thing, even though Husband and I aren't TTC. Like always, I got the result I was expecting:

And I was actually super bummed. I mean, of course I'm not pregnant. But part of me was actually hopeful this time... that even though Husband and I weren't trying, and weren't quite ready, that I would be anyway. Damn birth control for getting my hopes up for no reason! You suck! And AF better be here this month when I expect her!

Goals Checkin #7

2010-04-05T10:05:00.001-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Fail
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Fail

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Not due till next weekend

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 3/7 days
Weight: 167.2 lbs (-7.4 lbs)

So I gained weight again. I can't say that I'm surprised since we went to Husband's Mom's for Easter weekend and ate like kings (read: pigs). Including all that food and eating, I thoroughly enjoyed the weekend. I even got some sun! I'm bummed I gained weight, but today's a new week, a new day. Just need to start over again this week. I really need to go shopping and buy some lean cuisines... eating lunch in the cafe at work makes it hard to stay on track.

I went to my friend's first fitting on Thursday! That was a lot of fun. Her dress is so beautiful and I'm getting really excited for her wedding. I also picked up my bridesmaid dress and tried it on. Suffice to say... it does not fit. When we originally tried on dresses in December, the dress we ended up with was pretty flowy. The sample was a size too small, in that it fit, but barely, and was super tight around the chest. So I ordered the next size up. Then I set about to losing weight and now the dress that I received is too large. So I'm looking for someplace to do alterations. Fun!

Top 3 Thursday: Favorite Names

2010-04-01T08:30:00.000-04:00

From Confessions From a Working Mom and The (Un)Experienced Mom, today's question is:

What are your Top 3 favorite names? (for you, your kids, or just names you like!)

This one is pretty easy for me, although my answers may seem strange to people. Number 1's good I think. :P

3. Adira (or Anira) - okay, so I know that this one is totally dorky. I forget where I came up with these names, but I came up with one, and then switched the second letter to come up with the other. Anyway... these are two of my character names in World of Warcraft. These were the first two names I used and I've been using variations of them ever since (Adyra, Anyra, Aniraa). I know, I'm cool, right?
2. Kira (or Kyra) - This is a recent favorite of mine. I have no idea why I love it... it's just something about it. It's short, sweet, not super common, and it's Greek, and I'm a fan of all things Greek.
1. Kathryn - This will be used eventually. I've been in love with this name for years. There's just something about it - it's ancient, it's beautiful, and this alternate spelling of Catherine is perfect. I can't wait to name a daughter this some day.

What are your top 3 favorite names?

Wordless Wednesday: My Geeky Friends

2010-03-31T10:47:00.002-04:00

My Husband, the Joker

2010-03-30T12:02:00.002-04:00

My husband's a joker. He jokes a lot, and by a lot, I mean rarely does he stop with the jokes. What kind of jokes does he make, you ask? Usually ones about our relationship and how much he may or may not love me. Funny, huh? Riiight...

So last night as we were going to bed, Husband asks me, "Did we have something else to do this weekend besides go up to my Mom's for Easter?" Why yes, yes we do, as I've told you oh, only twenty-gagillion times. "Yes, we have an association meeting on Saturday." Husband and I bought our house in a development and it's part of an association. They have an association meeting every year in April to go over the budget and whatever else is on their minds. This will be the first meeting that Husband and I have lived here, so I want to go. I've been telling him about it for a month, but of course, he doesn't ever remember.

Anyway... then I add, "And I wanted to go out to dinner." "Out to dinner, why?" he asks. "To celebrate our six monthiversary." Husband and I will have been married for six months on Saturday. I know it's not much, compared to the six years we've been together, but these are our first six months being married and I didn't ask him to celebrate any other month, and he won't have to celebrate any other month again, so... I thought it would be nice to go out to dinner.

"Why would we celebrate that?" "Because I want to... we've been married for six months and I want to celebrate." "I guess that makes sense since they were a good six months and it's certainly not going to get any better."

It's not going to get any better? What does this even mean? Could this be... a joke?

"What's that supposed to mean? Are you saying that you think everything's going to get worse? Or are you saying that these past six months have been so great, you don't know how it could possibly get better than this?"

"I left it ambiguous on purpose."

Yes folks, that's my husband and the kinds of things he says. Does your husband makes jokes about your relationship like mine?

Goals Checkin #6

2010-03-29T08:57:00.000-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Sort of
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Check

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 3/4 days
Organized Mail: Sort of
Paid Bills: Check

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 5/7 days
Weight: 166.4 lbs (-8.2 lbs)

Okay, so I'm wicked excited to be down two pounds from last week and back on track! I worked really hard last week to eat well, and although I wasn't great on the weekend, I know I wasn't as bad as I usually am when I hang out with my brother, so bravo to me!

I wasn't as productive this weekend as I wanted to be. Our yard is looking like hell and I feel bad for our neighbors (we live in a development and are part of an association). I wanted to rake, but didn't have time. I'm thinking I'll try to do it on Friday since I have the day off. I did work on and complete the bridal shower invites I was making for my friend's bridal shower. Now I just need to put stamps on them and put them in the mail. I'm going to the post office tonight to make sure they don't weigh too much for me to use regular stamps.

I also received a few of my supplies for the bridal shower, so that's exciting. I'm still waiting on some table cloths, but then I think I'll have everything I need. I can't wait to set up and take pictures for you guys to see. It's going to be really elegant (I hope). I still need to figure out exactly what food and drinks I'll be serving and get supplies, but I can do that closer to the date.

Let's Talk about S. E. X.

2010-03-26T10:14:00.001-04:00

So... I think my husband and I have a pretty good relationship. I know we haven't been together for as long as some couples, but we made it past the magical three-year breaking point (many of my friends seem to break up with their significant others have three years for some reason). We've been together now for six and a half years, which I feel is pretty impressive, though probably not compared to others. It's certainly the longest relationship either Husband or myself have been in, and we expect it to last a lot longer.

Husband and I work really well together. Although we don't necessarily love the same things, we do have a lot in common and we enjoy spending time together. We even play World of Warcraft together. And although Husband doesn't usually watch a lot of TV, he'll watch TV with me in order to spend time with me. We also both really enjoy talking to each other. Although we're not the best conversationalists when we're having an argument (we both can be pretty stubborn and short-sighted), when we're not arguing, we really like talking to each other. It makes us both happy to talk and we'll often stay up late in bed chatting away.

But... there is something that we're not super compatible at. You know what I'm talking about... sex.

Don't get me wrong. Husband and I very much enjoy doing the deed, but we're definitely very different when it comes to our preferences. My husband is a very affectionate man and he'd probably be happy if we both quit work and just stayed at home and did it every day, all day. I, on the other hand, shudder at that idea.

Part of me wonders if I'm really just not very sexual at all, or if maybe it's my birth control. I've been on birth control for six years now, so there was only a short time in Husband and my relationship that I wasn't on it. I've tried many different brands, including generic, with different strengths and different hormones. I forget what the first kind was, but I feel like that one affected my libido the least... though I don't know. Maybe as I've gotten older, I've gotten less sexual? According to Husband, I used to be just as much an animal as he was in the beginning of our relationship, but for as long as I can remember, I've been like this: not interested. I wonder if, when I stop birth control, my libido will come back...

Anyway... it's a struggle for me. If it was up to Husband, we would being having sex at least once a day, preferably twice a day. He has this dream where I stop watching 20 hours of TV a week and he stops playing WoW, and we come home from work, have sex, eat dinner, have sex some more, and then go to bed. Every day. As it stands now, he's lucky if he gets it all.

One of the things we argue about the most is sex. He gets frustrated because I'm never interested, and I get frustrated because I feel like all I am to him is a sex toy. Obviously that's not all I am to him and I'm being irrational, but it's hard when you're really just not in the mood, you suck it up to be a good wife, think you've pleased your husband immensely, and then the next day, he's not satisfied. Am I right? Or am I crazy?

I was over at Much More Than Mommy reading her The PG-13 Warning is in Full Effect blog post, and she made some good points. One of the things she said that really struck me was:

"Sex is the one thing I can give The Husband that no one else can."

And I was like: Holy Crap! She's got a point! Husband certainly can't get sex anywhere else and I'd kill him if he tried. All he has is me. So I've been trying to be a better wife to him and make a point of giving him sex three times a week (trust me, that's a lot for me). And you know what I noticed? Our relationship has improved. Husband is happier, which in turn makes me happier. We haven't argued about sex in weeks, which is a big deal for us. Husband is even more willing to help out around the house or watch bad TV with me. He wants to satisfy me in the ways I enjoy (like snuggles, making me dinner, etc) because now he's getting satisfied.

So yay! I've learned an important sex lesson and it only took me six years to figure it out. Sex is super important in a relationship and I'm the only one that can help the husband out. I think it was Dr. Phil that said something like "when the sex is good, it's only 10% important in your relationship, but when it's bad or one party is unsatisfied, it's 90% important." I totally get that now.

Anyone else want to share their sex stories? Will my libido come back if I stop taking the pill? Is this topic taboo? Comment away, my fine friends!

Top 3 Thursday: Throw Away

2010-03-25T09:30:00.000-04:00

So I don't always do these types of blogs (like never), but I thought this one was cool and decided to do it. We'll see if I continue to do it or not...

From Confessions From a Working Mom and The (Un)Experienced Mom, today's question is:

What are the Top 3 things you should have thrown away... like, yesterday?

So I had to really think about this because I don't really consider myself a pack rat, but I am pretty lazy so... things do end up piling up around the house. We recently did a nice cleaning spree when we moved from the apartment to the house, but some things that shouldn't have made the move... made the move.

3. The broken clothes rack that I set aside to be thrown away when we were moving out the apartment that somehow made it onto the moving truck and then into my new garage... where it has continued to sit since we moved in (only 10 months... that's not that bad, right?).
2. Those old caffeinated cinnamons that my ex-boyfriend gave me. Like, can we say gross? He probably gave them to me when we had been dating for a year ago, so probably like a year before we broke up. So they're at least 1 year old by the time we break up. Then I start dating the man who will be my husband and that was... six years ago. So 1 + 6 = 7 years old. That's not that old, right?
1. The pizza boxes. That have started to pile up on my counter. So high we started another pile of them. Literally like 10 pizza boxes on the counter... and we only get pizza once a week, if even that often, so the oldest one has been there for probably at least two months, probably three. That's not that gross, right?

I'm not the only one that takes forever to throw away pizza boxes, right?

Wordless Wednesday: Blood Prince Council DOWN!

2010-03-24T10:00:00.000-04:00

*I know I'm a total loser

Convinced Husband?

2010-03-23T09:50:00.001-04:00

When Husband and I started dating years and years ago, I used to despise children. I thought they were loud, annoying, rude, etc. I didn't understand why people wanted them or why they couldn't seem to control them. Husband liked kids, but I spent a while convincing him that we didn't want any!

Now, six years later, I want them myself! The older I've gotten and more mature I've gotten, I've seen the joy that children can be and I want them for myself. I also don't want to get old without having a family of my own. Plus I'm not sure my parents would forgive me if I never had kids, haha! Anyway... now I have to go back and try to undo all the convincing I once did to my husband. I convinced him that if we didn't have kids, we could go on vacations every year! He's gotten accustomed to that idea (even though we don't go on vacations every year and he doesn't like taking time off from work), and now thinks having kids will cost way too much money, take up way too much time, and impede on his new dreams (that I put there)!

So now I have to convince him that having kids won't mess up the rest of our plans and that we can still go on vacations with the kids. I have to convince him that they won't be too loud, too annoying, take up too much money or time. Now, I'm sure they will be loud and often annoying and will cost us a bunch of time and money, but I also know they will be worth it. Convincing the husband of that has been challenging... more challenging than convincing him that we didn't want kids. Big mistake, me!

One of the things I've been doing lately is talking about kids in the future like there's no "what if." I'll just made very firm statements like, "When we have kids, I probably won't play WoW as much," or "You'd better be nicer to our kids than that!" That last one is in reference to Husband letting me know he's going to convince the kids that the monsters under the bed and in the closet are real! What a bully!

So, I don't think Husband is quite convinced... but I've been making it clear that I want kids and plan to have kids. I've even told him and others (my best friends) when we'll start trying to have kids. Hopefully by the time 2012 comes and I'm ready to get my groove on, he'll be fully on board as well!

Goals Checkin #5

2010-03-22T08:00:00.001-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Fail
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Fail

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 3/4 days
Organized Mail: Sort of
Paid Bills: Fail

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 4/7 days
Weight: 168.4 lbs (-6.2 lbs)

Holy crap, I'm up 1.4 pounds this week!!! I want to CRY! I'm so mad at myself right now for letting this happen. And I know exactly how it happened... those three days of bad eating are killing me! I have to get this binge eating on the weekend under control or I'm going to be fat FOREVER! Does anyone have any advice on how to ignore the urges???

Confession

2010-03-19T09:00:00.001-04:00

So I have a confession to make. It's actually quite silly but...

I play World of Warcraft (WoW).

There, I said it. I got it out of my system, so ha! Actually, if you knew me in real life, you'd already know this fun fact about me since it kind of consumes a lot of my time. And by a lot of my time, I mean roughly 12 hours a week. That's right, 12!

So here's the thing. My husband and I both play together. We leveled together and now we raid together. If you don't know what either of those things mean, don't worry, but they're fairly common in any MMO (MMO is short for MMORPG which stands for Massive Multi-player Online Role Playing Game), so if you want to have a conversation with someone about an MMO, you might want to look up those two things first.

So anyway... why does WoW take up 12 hours a week? Well, it's because that's how many hours we spend raiding. We raid Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Sunday from 7:00 p.m. to 10:00. Now, most people don't actually raid all those days (at least in our guild), but I have to. Why do I have to? Because I'm the guild leader. Yes, you heard me right! Not only do I play an MMO, I'm also the leader of a guild in one! CRAZY!

Here's the thing... I know that I want to start TTC in 2012 after we get back from London and hopefully, if I'm lucky, I'll get pregnant and have a little one shortly after that (*crosses her fingers*). What about all that fun WoWing? Well, I assume I'm not going to be doing it anymore once I have kids and I'll probably ease up once I get pregnant so...

My fear is that Husband won't stop... it's really his only hobby, and I don't mind now because I play too and watch a lot of TV and do other things and if that keeps him busy while I'm busy, that's fine by me. But what if when we have a kid, he still tries to play just as much? I'm scared that that's what will happen and I certainly don't want our kids to think that's okay - playing video games all the time...

Anyone else have a hubby that plays video games constantly (whether you do as well or not)? Will they stop (or have they stopped) when you get (got) pregnant?

Megan-ology

2010-03-18T11:03:00.001-04:00

Okay, so I saw a few people do this and finally decided to steal it. Thank you Al (Mission: Motherhood), Andrea (Waiting for Baby), Kaitlin (Ah... My Married Life), Tillie (A Nuttier Life), Cara (My Life With PCOS, As Told By Me), and Beryl (Chasing a Miracle). Thank you ladies!

FOODOLOGY:

What is your salad dressing of choice? Caesar
What is your favorite sit-down restuarant? Olive Garden
What is your favorite fast food restaurant? Taco Bell (at the moment)
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of? Popcorn!
What are your pizza toppings of choice? Pepperoni, Onions, Mushrooms, Hamburg (the boy got me addicted to this combo)

BIOLOGY:

Are you right-handed or left-handed? Right-handed
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? Nope! It's all still here!
What is the last heavy item you lifted? Umm... the trash?
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? Thank goodness, no!
Have you ever fainted? No

BULLCRAPOLOGY:

If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? I think I'd be happier not knowing
If you could change your name, what would you change it to? I wouldn't - the names I love now I plan to use for my children!
How many pairs of flip flops do you own? Two pairs, though one is falling apart...
Last person you talked to? My co-workers about getting coffee

FAVORITOLOGY:

Season? Summer - I love going swimming
Holiday? Christmas, with Halloween being a close second
Day of the week? Saturday
Month? June (hello, it's in the summer!)
Color? Red or Blue... I flipflop back and forth
Drink? Mmm... coke... though I try not to drink much anymore...
Alcoholic? Moscato wine (Reisling's good too)

CURRENTOLOGY:

Missing someone? The husband and the best friend
What are you listening to? The whirrrr of the AC
What are you watching? The monitor - see, I'm typing to you!
Worrying about? Whether I'll get everything done for my friend's bridal shower in time
What’s the last movie you saw? Timecrimes
Do you smile often? Everyday! All the time!
If you could change your eye color what would it be? Probably green
What’s on your wish list for your birthday? A dSLR camera
Can you do a chin-up? Probably not, I have zero upper body strength
Does the future make you more nervous or excited? Excited!
Have you been in a car wreck? The mailbox was in my way!
Have you caused a car wreck? Umm... I guess, but it was me vs. the mailbox!
Do you have an accent? I don't think so... New England (not Massachusetts)
Last time you cried? Monday night, but it was just a little
Plans tonight? Workout and then raid
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? Never, hope I never do either...
Name three things you bought yesterday? Coffee, english muffin, gas
Have you met someone who changed your life? Yes, a few people
For the better or worse? Always for the better
How did you bring in the New Year? Was at a friend's party
Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? No, I just watched Primer AND Timecrimes! I've learned not to mess with the past!
What songs do you sing in the shower? I don't sing in the shower
Have you held hands with someone today? No, Husband hadn't even gotten out of bed by the time I left for work!
Who was the last person you took a picture of? I know this one! Husband and a couple other people - it was at a party on Friday night
Are most of the friends in your life new or old? Newish (all from college or later)
Do you like pulpy orange juice? Ewww... pulp is gross... no
Last time you ate peanut butter and jelly? A couple years ago (with bananas and honey, soooooo good)
What were you doing at 12 a.m. last night? Sleeping
What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? Gnrrrr... tired...
How many televisions are in your house? Three, but we only use two regularly (living room, computer room)
What color cell phone do you have? Black and Silver

Wordless Wednesday: St. Patrick's Day

2010-03-17T09:34:00.000-04:00

Things to Give Up

2010-03-16T10:05:00.001-04:00

So, I've been thinking lately about things that I should give up, and will probably have to give up once I have children. I do a lot of... well... waste-of-time things that I enjoy. I've got a post coming up on one of them, but I figured I'd talk about the other one today. One of my most time-consuming joys is...

the television.

That's right. I'm a TV-Addict. I spend a lot of time watching TV. It gives me great joy to just lose myself in the stories of other's lives. I'm not much of a reality tv fan, although I have, in the past, watched Survivor, America's Next Top Model, Housewives of New York City, So You Think You Can Dance, Bad Girl's Club, and The Bachelor. I tend to not really watch these shows that often anymore, and they will be the first to go when I give up TV. I've already given up on Survivor, Model, and Dance permanately, and only occassionally watch The Bachelor, Bad Girl's Club, and Housewives.

Anyway... besides the reality shows, which I don't watch a lot of or very often, I have a lot of fictional dramas that I enjoy. I tend not to watch comedies... I can't really explain it, but I don't. I enjoy the hour-long dramas instead. Preferrably ones with over-arching storylines, although not all of them have them.

So, without further ado... my schedule:

Sunday

Desperate Housewives (9:00 ABC)

Monday

Gossip Girl (8:00 CW)
Heroes (8:00 NBC)
10 Things I Hate About You (8:00 ABCFam)
Life Unexpected (9:00 CW)
Make It or Break It (9:00 ABCFam)
Castle (10:00 ABC)

Tuesday

90210 (8:00 CW)
Melrose Place (9:00 CW)
LOST (9:00 ABC)
Glee (9:00 FOX)
V (10:00 ABC)
Parenthood (10:00 CW)

Wednesday

Surprise! No TV on Wednesday!

Thursday

The Vampire Diaries (8:00 CW)
Flash Forward (8:00 ABC)
Supernatural (9:00 CW)
Fringe (9:00 FOX)
Grey's Anatomy (9:00 ABC)
Private Practice (10:00 ABC)

Friday

Ghost Whisperer (8:00 CBS)
Stargate Universe (9:00 SyFy)
Sanctuary (10:00 SyFy)
Caprica (10:00 SyFy)

Saturday

Free day!

So... those are the shows I watch. I don't think I'm forgetting any... but it's possible. I know that I won't be able to watch 20+ hours of TV once I have kids, so some of these have got to go... but which ones? I know LOST will be over after this season, so that's one. I suspect Caprica, Flash Forward, V, Melrose Place, and Life Unexpected may be canceled, though nothing's for sure right now. Possibly other shows will be canceled... but there's always new shows to watch so...

What about you? What TV do you watch? Do you watch as much (or more) than I do? Do you plan to give it up when you have kids? Did you give it up when you had kids? Any advice for a TV-Addict like me??

Goals Checkin #4

2010-03-15T09:09:00.001-04:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Fail
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Fail

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Fail

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 4/7 days
Weight: 167.0 lbs (-7.6 lbs)

So woohoo! I ate bad three days and still lost 0.8 pounds this week! That's exciting for me, since I was almost positive I'd be up! In other news, I didn't pay the bills like I was supposed to or do anything else productive besides vacuum the living room. I think I may need to give up some of the television I watch so I have more time to do stuff. I spent almost all Sunday trying to catch up on last week's TV, and I'm still behind! Ugh!

Update on the In Law

2010-03-12T08:21:00.002-05:00

So Husband's sister called him up last night. They actually talked for quite a while, about what they had both been up to and what we were doing for Easter and when we could all hang out again, blah blah blah. So anyway, she told him about her car and how she needed to get the brakes fixed and something else and that it would cost $800 and that she couldn't afford it and then asked if she could borrow from him. He agreed immediately! Blah!

I tried to talk to him about it and explain how I didn't think she was financially responsible and I didn't want her to get into the habit of coming to him asking for money. He kept saying he didn't care and that he didn't mind lending her the money even if she didn't pay him back! Argh!!! That makes me mad! He seemed annoyed that I was even concerned! Apparently it's not cool for me to bash his sister to him! Grrr!!

The reason that he didn't discuss it with me first is because we have seperate accounts. We have a checking account together and we both put in 70% of our paycheck into that account. We use that to pay the bills, buy groceries, go on vacations, etc. Anything that's for us or the house or for us to do together, comes from that account. Then we each have our own checking and savings accounts. I'm not really sure why we have our own savings accounts... we probably don't need to do that, but when we got the joint account, we each had our own savings, so we didn't change it up. So anyway, we each keep 30% of our paychecks for ourselves. This money is used for our gas, food we buy separately (like lunch at work), and our student loans. I happen to spend my money a lot - new clothes, craft supplies, going out with my friends. Husband happens to save his.

So the $800 that he would be giving his sister would come from his accounts, not our joint one. He says its his money and he can do what he wants with it, which is fair, since I'm the one always saying that (since he wants me to save and I like to spend). So I guess it's not fair of me to expect him not to bail out his sister when he wants to. I just wish he would show a little more reservation when he does it, since we both know she spends her money on other things (clothes, drinking, a Wii), when she apparently should be saving it for things like (rent, her car, food).

Anyway... I'm annooyed... but maybe I shouldn't be?

Moneygrubbing In Law

2010-03-11T09:07:00.006-05:00

So Husband has a sister, my sister-in-law (SIL). She has a four year old son (who's a tyrant, by the way). She did maybe one year of college before deciding to drop out and move in with her boyfriend. They were together for five, maybe six years, and accidently got pregnant (who does that??). Anyway... they had the baby and seemed to be a happy little family for a while. The boyfriend had a decent contracting job and my SIL... um... well...

So anyway... there were talks about getting married and buying a house, but they were all just talk. They never bought a house or got married. Eventually they broke up, I think when the son was around two or three. The boyfriend moved out, but he continued to help pay for the rent of their apartment and he took care of the son half of the time. Good deal, right? Meanwhile, SIL continued what she was doing - shopping, partying, acting like she was 21 years old and not a mom. I've heard she even thought about giving her son to her ex-boyfriend, the father, so she would be free to do what she wanted without being bogged down with a child. I know, how aweful is this!

Fast-forward to this past Christmas. It's a couple days before Christmas and we're getting together with SIL and my husband's family on Christmas Eve. I'm done shopping, having done it early, when I get a text from SIL, which says something along the lines of "I'm so sorry, but is it okay if I don't get you guys anything for Christmas, I'm so broke!" Of course I let her know that it's perfectly fine she doesn't spend money on us - we don't need a gift, etc, etc. So we head down to her place for Christmas Eve (a place I've heard no one's paid rent on in months), and have a nice little Christmas celebration. This is where I discover that my broke SIL has bought a brand new outfit for Christmas and spent at least $300 on a Wii and accessories for her "son". I put that in air quotes, because he's only four and will he really use it all that much? Maybe... but I hope not.

Fast-forward to yesterday. SIL has e-mailed my husband asking for money. She's sooooooo broke, that she can't afford to get her car fixed and wants to "borrow" $800 from Husband. Borrow is, of course, in air quotes because I know she won't pay it back. I don't really know what's wrong with her car that it's costing that much to fix, and I'm not surprised she can't afford it, but I do know she still hasn't stopped partying since there are pictures of her partying all over Facebook from the winter.

So now what? I don't want my husband to give her any money, but I feel bad about it. She's a single mom and has recently gone back to school (finally) and doesn't make much money. Her ex-boyfriend finally stopped paying the rent on her apartment because he couldn't afford to pay for her place AND his place. Supposedly he doesn't pay child-support either, though last I heard, he was taking the son off her hands often enough (which is probably why she has time to party so much), so I'm not really sure he should have to pay. Am I an awful person because I don't want Husband to give her $800? I mean, we can definitely afford it - we're both Software Engineers with good jobs. But I know she won't pay it back and I know if she wasn't shopping/partying so often, she'd be able to afford to fix the car herself. I'm also worried that once he gives her a dime, she'll start coming to us more often for money. I guess she's been going to her dad (my father-in-law) a lot, but after a while, he decided to cut her off because she was still making bad decisions and wasn't financially responsible.

What do you guys think? Am I bitch for not wanting to give this mom a dime? She is family... what do you think?

Wordless Wednesday: Best Friends

2010-03-10T09:13:00.000-05:00

My Husband (and Me!)

2010-03-09T09:42:00.001-05:00

So I've been thinking that I should probably make a post about my husband and me since... I talk about my husband and me a lot, haha. Since this is my blog and he's a big part of my life, maybe people are a little curious about who we are. Or maybe not. Just humor me, okay?

Husband and I are both 26, although he's a few months older than I am. We met our Freshman year of college. We were both Computer Science (CS) majors and ended up being in the same CS class second semester. That class had recitations and Husband and I ended up being in the same recitation. Each week, you were paired up with someone in your recitation to work on the assignment. You held onto your partner for four weeks, and then you got a new one. Well, Husband and I got paired up that first week. And somehow we managed to stay partners for seven weeks, instead of four, although through no fault of our own!

Husband was shy. Shyer than I am, and I'm fairly shy. I originally thought he didn't really like me because he didn't talk to me much and we just did our assignments and went on our way. He also had a girlfriend at the time, so I didn't give him much thought. Well! First semester Sophomore year, we ended up hanging out a bit more. I forget why, but we'd go to dinner and stuff together. I found out him and his girlfriend had broken up over the summer, so that got me a bit interested. Plus he seemed less shy - probably being partners for seven weeks last semester helped loosen him up.

Anyway... my friends thought we were perfect together. We were both CS majors, both super dorky, and supposedly cute together. That's what they claimed. They would encourage me to invite him to dinner and to hang out, and surprisingly, he would. I didn't think about it much then - I think I assumed he didn't have very many friends (I know, I'm a horrible person!). Turns out he just thought I was cute (Score!).

So anyway... one day in October, I convinced Husband to come with me to a Lord of the Rings club meeting. I know, I know, I'm the dorkiest person alive. None of my other friends would go (probably because they wanted Husband to go with me) and Husband agreed to go. It was a neat meeting and we ended up reading from the book. I forget what else happened, but after the meeting, Husband and I parted ways. Well! When I got home, I was all gung-ho to watch me some Lord of the Rings, so I told my roommate that I wanted to watch it and wanted to invite Seth over. She encouraged me to do it. I asked Husband if he wanted to come to our dorm to watch Lord of the Rings. He was up for it, but he said he didn't really want to walk over to our dorm, hang out for 3 hours, and then have to walk back to his. After a quick conference with my roommate, I assured Husband that he could crash on our futon. And he agreed!

Now my roommate... she's a schemer, that one. Once Husband came over, she convinced one of her friends, who lived downstairs, to come on up to watch the movie with us. Husband and I sat on the futon, my roommate sat on my bed, and her friend sat her her bed. Cue to 3 hours later. The roommate and the friend were asleep! Or at least pretending to be, those jerks (haha, I love you guys!). My roommate had passed out on my bed and her friend had passed on on her bed. That left Husband, me, and the futon! I blushed a lot and asked if he minded if we share the futon. It was big enough for two. Of course he didn't mind, he said! Little did I know he wanted to spend the night snuggling (something I still love to do with him).

A couple days later, Husband came over again and again we spent the night on the futon (get your mind out of the gutter, we just snuggled!). This time we just did even though my bed was free. We ended up staying up almost all night talking and woke up early to talk some more. And on October 4, 2003 at 7:06 in the morning (or something like that), Husband asked me if I wanted to go out. (That's what all the kids were doing back then - going out meant you were officially dating, even if you didn't go out anywhere).

Five years later, to the day, Husband proposed to me. A year after that (minus a day), we were married. And we still love to snuggle, although we don't have a futon anymore.

Goals Checkin #3

2010-03-08T08:41:00.003-05:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Fail
Clean Kitchen: Fail
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Check

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 4/7 days
Weight: 167.8 lbs (-6.8 lbs)

So I'm really pleased that I'm down some weight this week. Definitely making some good progress, although I'm still bad at eating healthy on the weekends. Saturdays I tend to not even have hope for eating well because I've been hanging out with my brother and we tend to eat like pigs together, haha. Oh well - I'm still down!

Cleaning is apparently the area I need to do the most work - I didn't do anything this weekend! Bad Megan! I definitely need to clean up the house, though I have almost two months before Mo's bridal shower. I need to get the house clean before then - at least the living room, kitchen, and downstairs bathroom. I really want to get into a cleaning habit so Husband will let me get cats, haha!

Bachelorette Party Invitations

2010-03-04T09:17:00.001-05:00

So I figured I'd share with you guys something I've been working on for a little while now. As I think I've mentioned before, my best friend, Mo, is getting married! She was my Maid of Honor (MoH) for my wedding in October, and I'm her Matron of Honor (MoH) for her wedding! So I've been busy lately planning both her bridal shower and bachelorette party! Fun!

The bachelorette party is the thing I'm most looking forward to. For my bachelorette party, Mo took me to a spa to have nails and toes done and get facials. Then we went out for a night out on the town and the girls crashed at my place after! It was a lot of fun. Mo even had her fiance take out my fiance at the time so we would have the house to ourselves after.

Mo was my only bridesmaid and our wedding was planned in a matter of five months. She was super busy and I think super stressed trying to get everything done and planned that she had to do for my wedding, without any help! She did an AMAZING job, and I want to pay her back by being just as awesome a MoH for her as she was for me! Luckily for me, she's given me a LOT more time to plan things for her and she has another bridesmaid I can bounce ideas off of. This helps a lot as I can plan surprises for Mo without telling her the details, because I have someone else to talk to about what's happening. Mo really only had me to talk to! Poor girl!

So anyway... since I know she doesn't read my blog, I feel pretty safe posting these. The following is my design for Mo's bachelorette party invitations. I've already bought the paper and envelopes and so now I just need to start compiling the invites, although the invites really are just a formality. I've already gotten a yes from all the girls and made all the necessary plans. Anyway... here they are!

Let me know what you think!

An Award? For Moi??

2010-03-03T09:54:00.002-05:00

Okay Holly from Ready To Be A Mom, I officially love you! Holly gave me my first ever award (or two)! So yay for me! I'm a newbie blogger and she gave me an award! Thank you thank you thank you!!!

Okay, so technically this first award wasn't exactly to me, but I'm taking it anyway! Holly said "if you are reading this then I give this award to you!" Well, I read it, so this award is mine! Along with probably all of Holly's followers and friends!

Okay, so for this award, I'm supposed to tell you all where I see myself in 10 years. Okay, no problemo, Moe.*

In 10 years, I will be... um... 36 and hopefully 30 pounds lighter, haha! Okay, for realz - I'll be 36. I'm hoping to have two children, one boy and one girl. I assume I'll still live our current house (I love our house, almost as much I love Holly) except that the craft room will be one of the kid's bedrooms. Damn you children, stealing my space!! Hopefully by then, I'll have convinced Husband to let me get two cats (I love kitties, more than Holly, sorry Holly), and we'll have had a few trips under our belt. One to at least Greece (tentatively planned for next summer) and one to London (tentatively planned for 2012). Hopefully another trip thrown in there too, though I don't know where yet. Maybe Disney World with the little kiddos. Let's see... what else... 36... so hopefully by then the kids are in school so I can go back to work almost full-time (I love my job, fo shizzle). Although if they're too young, then I'll be working part-time and taking at least two days off to be with them. So... yeah!

Now I get to pick 10 of you lovely readers to give this award to!

My second award is also from the awesome Holly of Ready To Be A Mom (and I'm ready to see you as a mom, Holly)! This one actually is for me - she even linked my blog! Thank you Holly!!! Free advertising is the best and you are super awesome for giving it to me! Not that I'm selling anything... no... nothing to see here...

So here are the rules:

Put the logo on your blog or within your post.
Pass the award onto 12 bloggers. (6 new blogs for you and 6 oldies but goodies)
Link the nominees within your post.
Let the nominees know they have received this award by commenting on their blog.
Share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award.

6 New Blogs (they're all relatively new, but here are some of the newer ones)

6 Oldies but Goodies (again, not super old, but older than others)

Now, I actually follow a lot more blogs and have recently become addicted to blogs and my Google Reader, but I could only nominate... 10 + 12 = 22! So there they are! Thank you my sweet sweet blogging buddies! You are all awesome!!

*Moe is my imaginary friend, don't make fun of me.

Dentist

2010-03-02T11:20:00.001-05:00

So today's topic is kind of random and doesn't really have anything to do with my goals or children really. Like most kids I knew growing up, I was never very good at the whole brushing my teeth thing. I mean, I did it, because I had to, but it wasn't like I did a great job, and I was never very good at flossing. But I went to the Dentist every six months and it was never that big of a problem. I had the occasional cavity, but in general, my teeth were pretty good.

Fast forward to three years ago. I had graduated college and moved to be closer to my job and starting a Master's program. Focus was not on my teeth, obviously. But finally, after a year and a half or not going to the Dentist, I figured I probably should go and get back into the habit of going every six months. Boy, was I in for a rude awakening! My first dentist appointment was a shock. I had the beginning of peridontal disease - meaning deep pockets between my teeth and my gums. NOT good! Left unchecked, my teeth would eventually just fall out. Awesome!

Now it's two years later. I've been going to the dentist every three months and getting my pockets deep cleaned in a most painful manner. I've gotten skilled at the whole brushing and flossing fun and been even using listerine and act. Joy joy! But today's Dentist appointment was a disappointment. Three months since my last appointment and three full months of rigorous attention to my teeth, and they're worse than they were before! Just perfect. So now I have to set up an appointment with a periodontal specialist and pray that they can save my teeth from falling out. All this trouble (and over a thousand dollars spent at the Dentist) just because I decided to blow up going for a year and a half. That's only 3 appointments missed. And now my gums are separating from my teeth, my mouth is full of bacteria, and I could lose my teeth. So take it from me - go to the Dentist!

And to tie all this fun in with children - I vow to instill good brushing/flossing values onto my children, even if I have to scare them into doing it! And when my kids graduate and move and aren't under my care, I'm going to make sure I badger them until I know they're back in the habit of going to the Dentist. I wouldn't inflict this teeth business on anyone!

Oh, and if this wasn't bad enough - oral disease is linked with heart disease. Awesome.

Goals Checkin #2

2010-03-01T10:16:00.002-05:00

Reminder of the goals:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Check
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Check

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 4/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Check
Taxes: Check

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 5/7 days
Weight: 169.4 lbs (-5.2 lbs)

So I've finally lost 5 pounds since starting this journey, so yay to me! I know that I could've lost a lot more if I was better on the weekends, but at least we're making progress in the right direction. I also am pround of myself for paying the bills and doing our taxes. I just need Husband to sign the paperwork and I can mail everything in. I need to get better at the cleaning though. The living room and kitchen look okay, but the rest of the house is kind of a mess. Not cool. I need to get the living room, kitchen, and first-floor bathroom to be spotless by May 1st - the bridal shower for my best friend. Yikes! Lots still to do! And hopefully I'll be thinner by then too!

99 Things

2010-02-26T09:33:00.001-05:00

So I couldn't think of anything good to write about today, so I decided to steal from Holly over at Ready To Be A Mom for today's post. It's a list of 99 life experiences and you highlight the ones you've done. So without further ado...

99 Things

Started your own blog - hello, you're looking at it!
Slept under the stars - yes, though probably only the one time
Played in a band - no, I played piano
Visited Hawaii - for our honeymoon!
Watched a meteor shower - these are pretty cool
Given more than you can afford to charity - although I give to charity, not usually more than I can afford
Been to Disney World - in 6th grade - it was awesome!
Climbed a mountain - it was a little one, but still a mountain
Held a praying mantis - no thanks
Sang a solo - I don't think anyone would appreciate this
Bungee jumped - yikes, no, I'm scared of heights
Visited Paris - yes, but I was like 1...
Watched a lightning storm - these can be fun if they are far enough away
Taught yourself an art from scratch - does tracing count?
Adopted a child - no, but maybe someday!
Had food poisoning - thankfully, no!
Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty - yes, but I kind of don't remember doing it...
Grown your own vegetables - no, though I think it's admirable!
Seen the Mona Lisa in France - maybe? I've been to France...
Slept on an overnight train - I don't think so
Had a pillow fight - hasn't everyone? Or at least every girl?
Hitch hiked - no thanks!
Taken a sick day when you're not ill - of course! You can actually have fun when you're not sick
Built a snow fort - these are the best!
Held a lamb - I've petted one before
Gone skinny dipping - not in a long time though
Run a Marathon - I don't think I could if I tried...
Ridden in a gondola in Venice - hmm... maybe... but it would've been when I was 1
Seen a total eclipse - you bet!
Watched a sunrise or sunset - yes, in Hawaii, it was awesome
Hit a home run - this is talking sports, right?
Been on a cruise - yes, to the Caribbean - so much fun
Seen Niagara Falls in person - yes, although I was very young
Visited the birthplace of your ancestors - I've been to England and France so.. yes?
Seen am Amish community - do the Shakers count?
Taught yourself a new language - I learned French in highschool...
Had enough money to be truly satisfied - yes, although I don't anymore, haha
Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person - I think so, but I can't say for sure...
Gone rock climbing - yes, it's hard!
Seen Michelangelo's David - probably not
Sung karaoke - yes, and I'm very bad at it!
Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt - is it sad I don't know what this is?
Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant - sorry, no
Visited Africa - this would be cool to do!
Walked on a beach by moonlight - yep yep
Been transported in an ambulance - no, thankfully
Had your portrait painted - does a characacher count?
Gone deep sea fishing - no, I don't think I'd like to either
Seen the Sistine Chapel in person - don't think so
Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris - not sure...
Gone scuba diving or snorkeling - yes, in Hawaii!
Kissed in the rain - yes, but I prefer not to get rained on
Played in the mud - not in a long time though
Gone to a drive-in theater - I love these!!! So much fun!
Been in a movie - of course!
Visited the Great Wall of China - this would be so awesome to do
Started a business - unless babysitting counts, no...
Taken a martial arts class - one day, but yes!
Visited Russia - no, but I have a friend that's Russian...
Served at a soup kitchen - sadly, no
Sold Girl Scout Cookies - yes, yum! Definitely eaten more than I've sold
Gone whale watching - no, though could be fun
Got flowers for no reason - no reason to me, but he probably had a reason, haha
Donated blood, platelets or plasma - can't, unfortunately
Gone sky diving - no thank you!
Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp - I think I would cry...
Bounced a check - no, I try to avoid checks
Flown in a helicopter - in Hawaii!!!
Saved a favorite childhood toy - I still have the first stuffed animal my parents ever bought me (before I was born)
Visited the Lincoln Memorial - I don't think so
Eaten Caviar - umm... no
Pieced a quilt - I wish
Stood in Times Square - I don't think so
Toured the Everglades - no, though it would be cool
Been fired from a job - kind of... I semi quit right before it happened though
Seen the Changing of the Guards in London - yes!
Broken a bone - one would think, but apparently I have strong bones
Been a passenger on a motorcycle - no thank you!
Seen the Grand Canyon in person - yes, though again, I was young
Published a book - I wish!!!!!
Visited the Vatican - nope
Bought a brand new car - I tend to buy second-hand cars instead
Walked in Jerusalem - could be interesting
Had your picture in the newspaper - when I was young
Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year's Eve - no thanks
Visited the White House - I don't think so
Killed and prepared an animal for eating - eww...
Had chickenpox - unfortunately... missed a big play too
Saved someone's life - probably not
Sat on a jury - not yet
Met someone famous - Bruce Campbell!!!!
Joined a book club - kind of, it was a Lord of the Rings club, but we read from the book
Got a tatoo - no thanks
Had a baby - I want to soon!
Seen the Alamo in person - nope
Swam in the Great Salt Lake - nada
Been involved in a law suit - thankfully, no
Owned a cell phone - yes, the same one for the past 4-5 years
Been stung by a bee - hornets count, right?

Phew! Well, that's kind of pathetic actually. Only done 41 of the 99 things. That's less than half. I suspect 94 will be the next thing I do unless I do 82 first. I also really want to do 80, but that's probably not going to happen anytime soon (if ever).

What about you? How many have you done?

Fears

2010-02-25T09:12:00.003-05:00

So I always assumed that when I wanted to have a child, I would just stop taking my birth control and get pregnant. Lately, I've been reading a lot of different blogs by women who have been TTC for years, and it's made me stop and think. What if I have trouble conceiving?

I'm worried because I'm planning to start trying so late. I mean, by the time Husband and I probably start trying, I'll be late 28, almost 29. I mean, I know that's not old, but I've been planning to have a kid before I'm 30. If we have trouble, well, that's definitely not going to happen, right? Part of me wonders - should I start trying now? But then I worry that I actually would get pregnant before I'm ready. I guess I could not not-try... but again, if I got pregnant... I want a child, but not yet...

Were you scared it would take a while to conceive before you even started trying?

Thankful

2010-02-24T10:03:00.001-05:00

Recently I've been talking to a good friend, K, about her marriage. She's been married to J only a little longer than I've been married to Husband. They got married in May of last year and also bought a house that year too. Needless to say, K and her life were rolemodels for me and I did a lot of things she did. Although Husband and my wedding was maybe an eighth of the size of K and J's, there are a lot of similarities in our life. When J asked K to marry him, I was happy and jealous and was immediately on Husband's case to propose to me. I ended up getting an engagement ring that was actually very similar to K's. When J and K got married, Husband and I went out and bought wedding bands that were similar to theirs. When J and K bought their house, Husband and I went out and bought a house similar to theirs in a similar location. In fact we live only minutes from J and K.

But lately I've been talking to K about her relationship with J. They're both still in school (K's getting her MBA and J is getting his bachelor's since he was in the Navy before they got married), so maybe that contributes to a stressful environment. And I know with the economy, everyone's more stressful than before. K's not getting to the point where she's thinking about having children, but knows they won't start until they are both done with school. They own a house and with that comes a lot of new responsibilities that they weren't used to. Plus living together for the first time is probably stressful too. But still... even with all that stress... K and J don't get along like they ought to.

J takes advantage of K. He doesn't pick up after himself or do his fair share of the work around the house. He also knows that with K's job, he could cut back on hours for himself and they wouldn't have a problem. But instead of discussing the possibility of him cutting back his hours at work, he just decides to do it without talking to K about it. K also wanted to cut back on hours herself because she wants to work part-time when she's a mom. K and J have discussed this in the past, but since he decided he'd be the one working part-time, he now denies that they ever had the conversation about K doing it. He's not telling K that if she cuts back, they'd have to sell the house!

J's been picking fights with K for a while now. She asked him not to leave his wet towel on her side of the bed and he ignored her. She asked him to start the dishwasher when he got home, and he gave her a hard time about it. She wanted to watch 10 minutes of TV before going to bed, and J threatened to move the TV out of the bedroom so she couldn't disturb him. K watches maybe 3 hours of TV a week and whenever she does, J gives her a hard time about it. J also will start jobs around the house, like laundry, or the dishes, but he never finishes them. K will find her clothes in the washing machine and realize they've been in there for a week! And whenever K tries to talk to J about his behavior and how upset she is, he blows up at her. She's even tried to get him to go to counseling and he won't. She's at the point where she's thinking she's going to have to do something drastic... like leave him...

Before J and K got engaged, and before Husband and I got engaged, K and I used to talk about boyfriends. They were so similar. We were so similar. The aspects of our lives were so similar. How long we had been together was similar. How much we longed to get married was similar. And when J and K got engaged, I couldn't have been more happy for them. And then Husband and I got engaged and it was a dream come true. J and K's wedding was beautiful. Husband and mine was intimate. Throughout the planning for both K and my wedding, we were struck by the similarities of our relationships, our planning styles, and our men. And then J and K got married and I guess things went downhill for them. Husband and I got married and things went uphill.

I'm thankful that Husband is not like J. That being married did not make him bitter or more stressed or more irritable. When I go home to Husband, I know he will be happy to see me and he will want to spend time with me. K dreads going home because her husband will treat her the exact opposite of how my husband treats me. K wants a family, but she's worried about having one with J because of how he acts. She's also worried that if she leaves him, by the time she gets to the point of having a family, she'll be too old or it will be too hard. I'm thankful because I know that I'm with the right man and that when I want to start a family, he will be right there with me.

Thank you, Husband, for being a wonderful husband.

Must Have

2010-02-23T09:07:00.001-05:00

So one thing that I've really been dying to get is a digital SLR. I think they take amazing pictures and I'd like to think of myself as an amatuer photographer. Okay, that's not true, I suck at taking pictures, but I suspect part of the problem is my point and shoot. Recently one of my close friends got a dSLR and we ended up having his take the pictures at our wedding. They turned out beautiful, but now this friend is thinking of turning his hobby into more of a profession. I was hoping to have him take some maternity pictures and pictures of our kids once we have them. I still might do some of this, but unfortunately, he'll probably charge an arm and a leg by that point and we won't have access to the digitals, which isn't okay with me. I love having digital pictures and I was planning on making photo albums using mpix or another company when it comes the time to make albums of my kids.

So that's got me thinking I'm going to need my own camera. And the point and shoot just won't cut it. I want something that I can taking amazing pictures of my children with. So now I'm thinking maybe I can get Husband to buy me one for Christmas and my birthday this year. That way I could have it for Greece (hehe). This is the camera I want:

Did anyone else feel like they needed a new camera when they were deciding to have kids?

Goals Checkin #1

2010-02-22T09:11:00.002-05:00

So I've decided that I'm going to start a Goals Checkin series for Mondays. I need something extra to help me stay on track with my goals, so I'm hoping pointing out how I'm doing on them every week will be that extra incentive to stay on track. As you may remember, my goals before I start TTC were:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

Now let's see how I'm actually doing on them!

Cleaning/Maintaining

Clean Livingroom: Check
Clean Kitchen: Fail
Clean Bathrooms: Fail
Clean Bedroom: Fail
Clean Office: Fail

Groceries

Went shopping: Check

Mail/Bills

Checked Mail: 3/4 days
Organized Mail: Fail
Paid Bills: Fail
Taxes: Fail

Getting in Shape

Workouts: 5/5 days
Healthy Eating: 4/7 days
Weight: 170.2 lbs (-4.4 lbs)

So overall... um... not so good. I am proud of myself for working out 5 days this week. I'm mad that I only ate well 4 days instead of at least 6. I am proud I lost weight though, even though I had 3 bad days. I'm proud that I went grocery shopping on the weekend and don't have to go tonight for a change, but I'm mad that I didn't do more cleaning (and I had Friday off, so I totally could've). I'm also mad I didn't pay the bills. I HAVE to do that this week. I'm also mad I haven't done the taxes yet. Also have to do that this week.. maybe tonight.

Travel Goals

2010-02-18T10:55:00.002-05:00

A couple of things that Husband and I want to do before we have children is travel. For a while, Husband and I actually contemplating not having children at all, and just spending our time and money on traveling to exotic locations. Well, in time, my ideals changed, and I realized that having a family was really important to me. Even though in college I thought I would never have kids, I always knew in the back of my mind, that someday I would. As someday gets closer and closer, I've made mental lists of things I'd like to do beforehand, and one of those things in get some traveling in.

Husband and I honeymooned in Hawaii, but what we really wanted to do was go to Greece. We decided against it in the end because of the timeline of our wedding. We were getting married in October, and we didn't really want to go to Greece in October. We also didn't think we'd have time to fully plan a good Greece trip, or be able to take off the time we wanted in order to be there as long as we wanted. So we decided to put off Greece until the next year.

Well, the next year is here, and we're definitely not going to Greece. First of all, I still haven't updated my passport with my new last name. Second of all, now there's just as much time to plan a Greece trip as I had before when we decided there wasn't enough time. So now we're thinking 2011. And that's a plan I plan to stick to. We'll be updating our passports within the next couple months, and once we get them back, I plan to start full-fledged planning of Greece. We're thinking early June of next year.

The reason it's so important we go to Greece in 2011, is because we already have semi-plans for 2012. Last summer, we talked about going on a vacation with our best friends, M and Mo. We had gone with them on a vacation before, taking a Cruise to the Carribbean, which was awesome and so we thought we should do something again, before we each started having children. The Olympics were brought up - then the Summer Olympics were brought up - specifically the 2012 Summer Olympics in London! We'd all always wanted to go to London, and M and Mo really wanted to go to the Olympics, so that's the plan! Greece in 2011, Olympics in 2012.

I'm thinking when we get back from London, we'll start TTC.

Dieting

2010-02-17T09:32:00.000-05:00

One of the aspects of getting in shape besides all the exercise is dieting. This is something that I really struggle with and find very difficult. As a young girl, I used to be extremely active and picky about food, so I was very thin. As I got older, my tastes changed and food became more and more delicious to me. Soon, I was overweight, and old habits die hard.

I've been using the Calorie Count website as a way to keep track of my food intake, but I still find myself over eating on the weekends, or not recording my food some days. When I have children, I want them to have healthy eating habits, but I'm afraid that I currently would not be a very good role model for this. I can usually eat well for breakfast, lunch, and even dinner, but as the night wears on, I'll find myself snacking like a man woman, eating anything and everything in the house. And on the weekends, I stop recording my food altogether and have big dishes for all my meals.

How do you stop craving the foods you crave, like sodas, ice creams, or chips? What healthy substitutes are there for these cravings? And how do you train yourself that a portion is really half of what you're used to?

WAHM vs WOHM?

2010-02-16T08:12:00.000-05:00

Recently, I've discovered there appears to be some sort of debate going on in the blogsphere about the hardships by working at home moms (WAHMs) vs work outside of home moms (WOHMs). Each group seems to think that they have it harder than the other and they get really offended when the other group disagrees. Is this crazy, or is it just me?

Seeing as how I'm not even a mother, so I've done neither the WAHM thing or the WOHM thing, I can't really say one way or another which group has it worst. I am inclined to understand the WOHMs more though, probably because I will one day be one of them (hopefully). I get the impression that both groups have it hard, but for different reasons. It's probably hard to meet your deadlines and work your full day when you're at home and have a toddler. It's probably hard to balance work life from home life if they're both done in the same place. But it's also probably hard to be away from your children for most of the day, or to have to leave work/not be able to work because of your children.

Does anyone understand this debate and why it's so heated? Please, shed some light for me!

Ugh!

2010-02-15T08:03:00.000-05:00

I'm mad at myself today. I had a completely useless weekend. And by that, I mean that I was completely useless over the weekend and got nothing accomplished, and even set myself back on some things.

I didn't go grocery shopping. Which means I have to go tonight after work.

I didn't clean the house at all. Which is disgunting and I would never raise a child in that filth!

I didn't pay the bills. Which means I need to do it this week or next weekend and actually do it.

I didn't do the taxes. Which means I need to do it this week or next weekend.

I didn't fill out our passport paperwork. Which means this is another thing I have to do next weekend.

I didn't exercise or stick to my diet. Which is why I'm up 1.2 lbs this week instead of being down.

So, in summary... I suck. Hopefully this week will be better.

Reasons to Wait

2010-02-12T08:21:00.003-05:00

Although lately I've become obsessed with my desire to have children, there are a few reasons to wait, some of which I've already pointed out.

One of my biggest reasons for waiting is actually occurring this year. My best friend, Mo, who was the Maid of Honor at my wedding, is getting married this year! She chose me as her Matron of Honor, and as such, I have lots of stuff to do. I'm currently planning her bridal shower and bachelorette party, both of which should be lots of fun. Both parties also will include some alcohol, and partying with my best friend is another reason I want to wait. Plus I already purchased my bridesmaid dress and I don't think it would fit if I became pregnant. I'm also not sure it will fit if I don't lose some weight...

Other reasons, that I think I already touched upon, was Husband and my travel plans. We want to go to Greece in 2011, either end of May or early June. We also want to go to London for the Summer Olympics in 2012. These are things that we could do with a child in tow, but I think they would be more fun without one. Greece is our second honeymoon, and I'm pretty sure a newborn could care less about all the sight seeing I want to see. And then the Olympics, we're going with friends of ours... one of which is currently anti-babies and would not appreciate us bringing one with us, haha. Plus I'm thinking traveling out of the country will just be easier with adults. Although I do want to bring any children we have places. My parents brought me to Europe when I was little, and back again to England when I was older. I'd like to do something similar.

Do you (or did you) have plans for before you TTC?

He Laughed at Me

2010-02-11T08:29:00.001-05:00

So I told my dear husband (DH) about my plans to get into the habit of cleaning the house on a weekly basis, and also going grocery shopping. This was, of course, when we were grocery shopping on Monday, not on the weekend like I had planned. His response: to laugh at me. Seems he thinks I'm doing an awesome (that's a sarcastic awesome for those who can't tell) job already and he's sure I'm going to be great at it (more sarcasm).

Not sure how I should feel about this. I mean, we both had a big chuckle since the house is still covered in dust, and we were shopping for groceries three days after when I had planned to do it. I'm also concerned that he thinks I won't be able to do it, or that I'm too lazy to do it. I mean... I am lazy... that's something I'm trying to change though! Hopefully he'll be more confident in my cleaning/shopping abilities once he starts seeing results. Right?

Daycare

2010-02-10T08:37:00.001-05:00

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, even though Husband and I aren't having children anytime soon. But it concerns me about what we'll do when we have children. Husband and I both have decent paying jobs, as we're both Software Engineers, but I don't think either of us makes quite enough that we could live off one salary, especially with our mortgage and our other bills. So that got me to thinking - what will we do once we have kids?

I've kind of discussed it with Husband. He wants to continue to work full time once we have children, which is okay by me I guess. I always assumed I'd be the one who worked part time if it came to that. Although I'd love to be a stay at home mom (SAHM), I just don't think that would be possible. So what will we do? I'm assuming I'll go back to work part time after my maternity leave is over and probably work three days. At my company, part time is 20 or more hours, so I'd have to work three days to get there, or work two 10-hour days. I thought about doing that, but I'm just not sure how feasible that would be.

But what will we do with our children when I'm working part time? The only friend I know that has kids is lucky enough that her family all lives very close by. Her fiance's mother takes care of the child two days, her mom takes care of her two other days, and her sister takes care of her one day, so that my friend can still work full time and not have to pay for a sitter. Husband and I aren't lucky enough to live so close to family, and even if we were, all of our family still works full time, Monday through Friday, just like us. They couldn't help take care of our kids, even if they wanted to.

So that's why I'm thinking daycare is my only option. I had been hoping that I'd be lucky enough to have children when other friends were having children, and then I could convince them to all work part time on different days so that we could all take care of each other's children. I think I have to give up on that idea though, because the two friends I talked to about it weren't very receptive. One wanted to work even more than I do and figures her family will help out. The other is set on daycare because she doesn't think she'll be able to work part time at all. So I guess that leaves me with daycare too.

But I don't know the first thing about daycare. One of my friends was saying that they would never place their child in daycare until they were old enough to speak. She was saying that if the daycare was abusive or neglectful, a child too young wouldn't be able to tell you about it. That scared me! Does that happen often with daycares? I don't think it's possible for me to just not work for years for my kids to get old enough to talk before I leave them in someone else's care. So what other options do I have? I have to do daycare, right?

What's your opinion of daycare, especially for babies?

Getting in Shape

2010-02-09T07:46:00.001-05:00

Now, I don't necessarily considering being in shape a prerequisite for being a mom, but it is something that's important to me and something I feel like I need to do for myself. For one reason, I'd like to learn healthy habits in order to pass them on to my children. For another, my husband has a superior metabolism and I don't like weighing more than him.

One of the things I've been doing a lot of lately is looking at maternity pictures. There's something about pregnant women that is just so beautiful. I'd like to be able to document my pregnancy like many women have before and have these gorgeous portraits of my pregnant self. One problem: I'm a fatty, and pregnant or not, I'd still look like a fatty. This is simply unacceptable to me, as I hate my picture being taken when I think I look like a cow. So getting in shape for me is a prerequisite for being pregnant. Besides, I want people to be able to tell I'm pregnant, not just wonder if I'm gaining more weight.

So, here's to honesty: I'm currently 171.2 lbs (as of Monday), and I'd like to get to 140 lbs or less before it's baby-time. That would, finally, put me under my husband's weight (who's one of those super thin freaks of nature). Oh, and a note of context, I'm 5'5".

Weekend Fail

2010-02-08T08:28:00.001-05:00

So per my schedule, I should've gotten a few things done this weekend, including grocery shopping and cleaning the house. Unfortunately, neither of those things happened. If I did have kids, they'd be going without dinner tonight! Not good! I'm certainly used to weekend fails by now since I'm almost never as productive as I mean to be, but it's not a good habit to be in. I don't think my mom ever had a weekend fail, even when she used to work on weekends. My parents were always good about buying groceries once a week and keeping the house clean! How did they do it??

I did at least exercise this weekend both days even though I really didn't want to on Saturday. I also started making thank you cards (I know, I'm months late on these). I was also a good Matron of Honor to my best friend and went shopping with her to buy lace and wedding shoes. So I guess those are things I did well, sort of.

When you're in the habit of chilling on the couch all weekend and hanging out with your friends, how do you change to be motivated to go grocery shopping and clean? Is it just because you have to? I need to get into the habit of doing those things!

Timeline

2010-02-05T13:05:00.004-05:00

So when I realized how much I wanted to be a mom, which actually was quite recently, I began to envision my life and where I wanted it to be when Husband and I start TTC. I knew that whatever we did, we probably wouldn't start trying until after the 2012 Summer Olympics (assuming we actually go). Then I got to thinking... 2012 seemed so far away. How was I going to last that long? How would I keep myself motivated? There were so many things I wanted to do, and to be good at, before having a child. But if I keep thinking about how far off having that baby was, then I'd never keep my motivation to do the things I want to do.

So I came up with a timeline. I made up a small calendar outlining 2010, 2011, and 2012. It included days to exercise (goal: get in shape), days to pay the bills and handle mail (goal: get into habit of taking care of mail and bills in a timely fashion), and days to clean and go grocery shopping (goal: maintain a clean house, go shopping once a week). These items are important things I need to get into a habit of doing on a regular basis before I can really view myself as mom-material. Here's 2010:

Maybe it looks crazy, but it helps me stay focused. The blues are exercise days. I've been using EA Sports Active for the Wii, and doing the 30 Day Challenge. This routine advises working out for two days (one day focuses on upper body, the other day focuses on lower body) followed by a rest day. Rinse and repeat. The greens are chore days. These are the days I'll be cleaning the house and going grocery shopping. The reason why it's not always on a Saturday is because I have every other Friday off. So I figure I'll do chore day on my off-Friday, and one weeks where I work Friday, I'll do it Saturday. Reds are for the mail and bills. I want to take care of all mail accomulated in the past month and pay the bills on the second Sunday of every month. Purples are my favorite: free day. The reason I have so many is because M and Mo are getting married this summer. I'm taking free days for Mo's bachelorette party and the wedding. I also have free days for Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, and Husband and my anniversary.

Welcome

2010-02-04T13:00:00.005-05:00

Hello!

Welcome to my "Journey Toward Motherhood." This will actually be a long journey, as my husband and I aren't even trying to conceive (TTC) yet. We've actually only talked about kids in the sense of "yeah, those would be nice to have some day."

Even so... I've been thinking a lot about having children lately. I've been visiting other blogs of Moms, Moms-to-be, and those that are TTC. It's really been inspiring, and it's made me want to make my own blog. Why? Well, because I can, haha. And because I like to write. And I want to be a mom. And I want to document this journey.

So back-story: I'm 26, have a Master's in Computer Science, and am married to a wonderful man. We met in college and have been together for six years, but only married for four months. I'm a planner and a doer. I've been planning since I was little: figuring out what I needed to do well in life. Step 1 was to get good grades to be able to take high end classes in high school. Step 2 was to get good grades in high school and join clubs and take the right classes to get into a good college. Step 3 was to get good grades in college, join some different clubs so I could get an internship. Step 4 was to do well at my internship, maintain my good grades, advance in the clubs so I could get a good job. My job started me off in a development program where I had to get my Master's. That introduced Step 5: getting good grades in my Master's program so that my company would continue to pay for it, while doing well at my job so I'd get a promotion after two years, then another one after three, and complete my Master's. Near the end of the Master's journey, my boyfriend at the time proposed, which introduced Step 6: plan a wedding and buy a house. Within a year, we owned a house and were wed.

And that's where all the planning and figuring ended. I had a Master's, I had a job, I had a house, I had a husband. What now? For the past four months, I've been enjoying the life of a newlywed, but part of me is bored, and wants something to plan for, something important to do. And that's got me thinking: children!

Okay, so I know being bored is not a good reason to have children, but I promise that's not the only reason I want them. Being bored has just gotten me to think about them more and more these days. And I've always known, in the back of my mind, that I would have a family. Now that I'm finished all the planning and doing I had been doing all my life, children is the next thing to plan for.

But my husband and I aren't ready yet. When we married, we talked about having kids, and we thought we'd want them when we were 28 or 29. I'm only 26, and although I've been thinking about kids a lot, I'm sticking with my 28 time frame for a few reasons. 1: there's some things Husband and I want to do before having kids, such as going to Greece for an extended honeymoon, and possibly going to London with some of our friends in 2012 (Summer Olympics!). 2: looking at the house and my lifestyle, it's clear I'm not ready for kids. Number 2 is the big one for me, and the one that I'm going to work on to prepare myself for children.

So here are a few of the things I want to do before Husband and I start TTC:

Clean the house and get in the habit of cleaning/maintaining it once a week
Get in the habit of buying groceries once a week
Get in the habit of taking care of the mail and bills in a timely fashion (goal: pay bills 2nd Sunday of every month)
Get in shape and stay in shape (goal: work out 4-5 times a week using the Wii; real goal: get to 140lbs)

When I think of my Mom, I think of what an ideal mother is. Her house is always impeccable, her cooking is amazing, and she follows a reasonable schedule. I'm not like that. My house is a mess, my cooking is terrible, and we buy groceries when we run out of food. These are bad habits I want to break (well, maybe not the cooking one...) before I'm ready to have kids. I want to live the lifestyle (to some extent) that I would imagine a mother would live before I'm a mom.